The Divorce Hotel – where checking in can lead to a quick exit?

Already up and running in 6 “high-end” hotels in the Netherlands the “Divorce Hotel” concept may be making its way to our shores in early 2013 if its creator has his way.

The idea is that couples wanting to separate amicably and quickly check in on a Friday (into separate rooms!) and over the course of the weekend negotiate their marital finance settlement, children issues and Divorce with the help of mediators and lawyers, who are provided as part of the flat fee package (I shall leave aside the issues about how experienced the lawyers may be – vis a vis fitting it all into a fixed package, the choice of lawyer and whether the client can work with them etc. etc.)

I understand that 17 couples have tried this concept in the Netherlands and all but 1 have apparently been successful in their attempts to negotiate settlement and leave all but divorced at check out on the Sunday.

Also understood is that couples who apply to go to the Divorce Hotel are screened beforehand to rate their chances of success with only 1 in 3 being accepted. Taken with the reports that the creator of the concept is negotiating with television companies in the U.S to launch a reality series, the cynic in me wonders whether the screening has more to do with the perceived success of the concept than any genuine attempt to identify couples who would do more damage to each other and any children as a result of their inability to negotiate.

That aside, I wonder whether this kind of service is what the British public want or need.

I understand that the concept came about as a result of its creator having witnessed what by all accounts was the stressful and acrimonious divorce of his college friend. The driving motivation is to reduce hostility between the parties and deal with matters quickly for a fixed fee but the implication appears to be that if couples choose the more traditional route of instructing their own solicitors, they are somehow going to become more hostile and matters will be dragged out for months at a vast cost.

I am painfully aware of the perception that the general public have about the legal profession but I do think that there are a great number of family law solicitors who want to do the best for their clients and who offer an excellent service. Of course there is a cost to the service, expertise and knowledge provided by solicitors but, when you consider the often complex nature of the assets being dealt with and the fact that we are talking about people’s future security and balance that against the costs, I don’t consider those excessive.

Add to that the increasing number of fixed fee arrangements for Solicitors’ services and the availability of Mediation already on Divorce and Separation and I wonder what the Divorce Hotel is offering in addition.

Of course it offers luxury surroundings and the promise that matters will be resolved over the course of a weekend but is the luxury enough to prevent parties feeling pressured.

I know that parties make their “booking” with the best of intentions to remain amicable and reach agreement but I cannot believe that they will have really thought through every issue that is likely to be touched upon or discussed. I can’t believe that at some point relations won’t become fractured, perhaps as a result of the other raising a point that they hadn’t considered before – what then of the 48 hour timescale?

Also of concern is that parties don’t have sufficient time to process the information and think through their decisions – even traditional Mediation allows significant time to make sure that parties have advice and are able to process information. My experience of clients tells me that they, even those who have been separated for some time, are emotional about the process of Divorce or Separation and this impacts enormously on their decision making abilities.

I cannot imagine that the number of major decisions that would be needed, to deal with financial settlements and issues concerning children, could be made properly in 48 hours – irrespective of the intentions of the parties to remain amicable.

Can this be the pressure that people want on their Divorce?

Of course, it might be that the couples’ financial arrangements are simple and there are no children involved – meaning less major decisions to be made but, if that is the case, why bother with the hotel stay, why not discuss matters together or with the help of mediation services already available – why not do some of the paperwork for the Divorce yourself or with the guidance of a Solicitor to speed things up or cut costs.

I have no doubt that, as we progress through this year and into next, separating couples will be bombarded with different options and different service providers, all vying to deal with their matters – be those online services, Co-op legal services, fixed price packages (of varying quality and degree), national umbrella brands or the Divorce Hotel model.

To have options is good – no one option will suit all people – but what you must be clear on when facing such issues as Divorce and financial negotiations is your priorities and emotions. Only being aware of both will lead you down the route most appropriate for you.